A breaking heart.

Do you remember the post about the girl who cut herself? 

I don't know how to start. My heart is breaking a bit today. I heard from the young lady, she is 14 now, that cut herself after one of the meetings. 

Have you heard about facebook or that kind of thing, well they have something in Northern Ireland kind of like it, called bebo. So before I left for the states, I signed up for this so the kids could have a way to keep me up dated and I could see how they were doing. 

Well, I got a message that made me bust into tears. Stephen, was so worried someone died or something. It read simply, "Miss yohoo :) ". Oh, how my heart is hurting, thinking of that little girl. 

I didn't realize how much those two simple words could mean to me. She didn't say she missed the pizza or the games, she missed me.

 In my heart I know it really isn't me at all that she is missing, it is the love of Jesus Christ that she saw through me. 

Oh, how I miss her and the other kids. I miss the way they would wind me up during our Friday night outreach. I miss them coming to the house to talk about the Lord. I miss them telling me about their day. I miss them playing ping pong with Stephen and singing songs on a Saturday morning after visitation. 

I miss the way they would tell me what their teachers said about america or how they would ask if I knew 50 cent ( a raper in LA somewhere I think). I miss hearing them run up the stairs for sunday school. I miss correcting them when they say bad words, or asking them not to smoke in the hallway.  It is the million little things I miss most. 

I miss them so much.  I have not talked a lot about them since I got back mostly because it hurts so bad not knowing what is happening to them. I praise the Lord for the 10 that got saved while we were there and my heart breaks for the ones that are still lost. 

I am praying that we get back to Northern Ireland soon. Not just for this young girl and these kids but for all of them. They all need a Sister or Brother that cares about them, someone that will tell them about a Father who loves them more then they could ever imagine. 

Please pray for this young lady, she is still lost and looking for the piece to the puzzle of life, only God can fill.

Who is reading your blog?

Well the answer for me is I really don't know. I was at a missions conference this week and one of the wives told me she read my blog. I was shocked and amazed, one that she knew I had a blog and two that she would actually take the time to read something on it. 

I have to admit that sense getting back from Ireland, I have fallen down on my blogging. It is not that we are not doing anything important or staying busy, I just kinda felt weird about writing how things are going when all of you live in the states. Then I was reminded that even if you live here things pop up that are blog worthy. 

We may live in the same country and all of that but every place we go is unique in its own way. 

The people, church's, town's, states, they all have a way of showing you something about yourself God want's you to see. Maybe every situation isn't perfect and it may challenge you in ways you could not imagine that is all the more reason to share it with others. 

Then there are those people and places that bless and encourage you beyond word's. People should get to hear that sort of stuff too. 

I really want to share what the Lord is doing in this journey, called our lives. 

C.H. Spurgeon

Just a thought from C.H. Spurgeon 

"Thy Redeemer."—Isaiah 54:5.

JESUS, the Redeemer, is altogether ours and ours for ever. All the offices of Christ are held on our behalf. He is king for us, priest for us, and prophet for us. Whenever we read a new title of the Redeemer, let us appropriate Him as ours under that name as much as under any other. The shepherd's staff, the father's rod, the captain's sword, the priest's mitre, the prince's sceptre, the prophet's mantle, all are ours. Jesus hath no dignity which He will not employ for our exaltation, and no prerogative which He will not exercise for our defence. His fulness ofGodhead is our unfailing, inexhaustible treasure-house.
His manhood also, which he took upon him for us, is ours in all its perfection. To us our gracious Lord communicates the spotless virtue of a stainless character; to us he gives the meritorious efficacy of a devoted life; on us he bestows the reward procured by obedient submission and incessant service. He makes the unsullied garment of his life our covering beauty; the glittering virtues of his character our ornaments and jewels; and the superhuman meekness of his death our boast and glory. He bequeaths us his manger, from which to learn how God came down to man; and his Cross to teach us how man may go up to God. All His thoughts, emotions, actions, utterances, miracles, and intercessions, were for us. He trod the road of sorrow on our behalf, and hath made over to us as his heavenly legacy the full results of all the labours of his life. He is now as much ours as heretofore; and he blushes not to acknowledge himself "our Lord Jesus Christ," though he is the blessed and only Potentate, the King of kings, and Lord of lords. Christ everywhere and every way is our Christ, for ever and ever most richly to enjoy. O my soul, by the power of the Holy Spirit! call him this morning, "thy Redeemer."

Father's in the Ministry

On Father's Day,  I have a ton of men that pop up as father figures in the ministry. I thought I would share some of them with you and most likely they are a father figure to you. 

John Pearson and his family are very precious to me. They knew me before I knew Jesus so you can imagine the history that we share. The thing is they loved me from the very start. I was a hard shell to crack so it took some time invested to see any results from their acts of kindness. The little things made the most difference. 

One of my favorite memory's is when I got saved and John came up to me and said "Write this date down in your bible, the devil will try to steal it from you." I nodded and that was it. Then a couple of years later after the devil tried stealing it from me, I remembered what he said. Oh, there have been a million times the Lord has used John and Sandy to help me deal with some dozes' in life. Some times they didn't even know they were helping, I would see how they lived, they made me a part of the family , through that God allowed me to see changes I needed to make in my own life. 

Another thing that really brings back memories, is when I asked if the girls could spend the night at my house. Honestly, I thought they would say no. So when they said yes, I was so honored I got to take care of there girls. It was a huge blessing and encouragement that John and Sandy trusted me that much.

I could go on and on about the Pearson's, I love them with all my heart. 

I really have been blessed to have some great father figures in the ministry. Brother Austin, Brother Tony both of these men, on more then one occasion have given me my fare share of correction but never without an equal or greater amount of love to back it up. 

Good Night, I have seen these men flat on their faces praying for the world, in a room full of young men, hoping God would touch the hearts of men in that room, in america and the world. Asking God to move men to action to get the gospel to a lost and dying world.  

I have had them ask me tough questions I didn't know the answer to. Just to see if I would try and figure it out. I have seen rooms moved by the love these men have for the ministry and for those that work in it with them. Really, there is not a way to fully describe how it feels to know that you work with such great men of God or Men of a Great God. 

Mark Coffey, is not old enough to be a father figure to me, but he as been a great brother figure and since he is a dad. I wanted to say how much the friendship I share with him and Amy, has ment to me over the years. You both have ... well you are ... I can't even find the words that express just how much, Stephen and I love you two. When we need you, you are there, when we say we don't need you, you are there. So we wanted to say thank you for that. Amy and Steph are the sister's he never had and Mark and Trent are the brother's that drive you to do more. 

Thank you guys. 

Happy Father's day to all of you. Please know that you have more people thinking about and praying for you today than you think. 

Happy Father's Day

What a wonderful day to remember our Daddy's of this world along side the heavenly Father we all share. 

I just want to say how much I love God the father for always being there when I needed him and especially for being there when I thought I didn't.  I think after I got saved I truly realized what a father was supposed to be. It is not always hugs and kisses on special occasions, all though I do love those times. It is a lot more correction then I want but I always need.  I have been through some trials growing up and I'm sure I will have tons more come my way. That is why my relationship with my heavenly father is just so important. Not because of what he does for me, because of who he is. He is my everything. 

Really, I just am in awe of how much he loves me. 

I love you Dad.

I wanted to take a minute to send a Happy Father's Day not only to my Heavenly Father but the Daddy God gave me here. My dad is great, it took him a while to get God's drift on what being a dad is all about, and after a couple close calls, he got the point. So I thank God for the Daddy he gave me and how he cleaned him up to the man he is now.  My dad calls me for no reason just to say he loves me. He reminds me that Jesus is coming again and to be ready. He is always there to lend a helping hand. He loves Stephen like he was his own. God gave me a better daddy then I deserve.