I wonder?

JOHN 20:1

Now the first day of the week Mary Magdalene went to the tomb early,

while it was still dark, and saw that the stone had been taken away from the tomb. 

It's nearly 5 am , things are still and silent, as restlessness put its hold on me I could sleep no longer and my thoughts were drawn to Mary Magdalene. 

I wonder if she slept at all? Could it be that she waited to go to Him as long as she could, then when she could wait no longer went to the place she thought she would find him. 

Was she with the others when she left to see her Lord . I can see her in my head, moving about gathering together things she would need to honour her Master, Lord, her Jesus. Between the tears and her heart break realizing she could do this last thing for Him, for he had done so much more for her. He had for given her sin. 

When we loose someone so dear to us we can not but help replay our lives together with them. The moments that changed us, reassured us, gave us hope, made us angry and bonded us to this person in the first place. We remember the first time we meet them, the first time we loved them, the times that led to us loosing them. 

Oh, the pain that she must have felt of losing her Lord, and when she could not sleep one more minute if she slept at all, she went to were he was supposed to be, what kind of preparation she must have been making in her heart, to see her Lord one last time. 

Then she saw the unthinkable, the stone rolled away from the tomb.  The terror that must have over taken her as "...she ran to Simon Peter and the other disciple, whom Jesus loved,..." John 20:2 , "So they both ran together,..." John 20:4

Here comes the good part. 

John 20:13 "Then they said to her, "Woman, why are you weeping?" The two angles speaking here. She probably exclaimed through her tears and heart ache what happened as she began to feel the heart build with in her, when a man's voice asked her what she was seeking? Not know it was Him, I asked if he or if he knew what happened to her Lord, letting him know she would take her Lord away.

Then He called her by name, "Mary!"  she  turned around and saw Jesus, her Jesus, the one who she saw die from our sins as he hang from the cross. Did her heart leap for joy, skip a beat, overflow with love for her master, oh I think it did and all at once. Then he gave her the task of telling the others, telling them the wonderful news, that he was not died but had risen. What Peace she must have had knowing her Lord was not laying in a tomb but He had risen.

That is the same peace we have today. How exciting is that? To know my God, my Lord, my King, is not in a tomb somewhere, he is alive and with the Father.  

A merry heart

I really want to be an encouragement to my husband and more times then I would like to admit, I am the opposite.  My actions, body language and tone of voice at times ring out loud and clear I am not happy with this or that. I have to be on guard about the way I am acting or thinking because even though I do not say I am unhappy, mad or sad; my actions will betray me. 

I need to remember that a merry heart doth good like a medicine and to guard my heart at all cost or it will betray me. 

What will please God and my husband? Contentment, faithfulness, a meek and quiet spirit. The last thing my husband needs is to worry about my feelings every second. He needs to free to work in or on the ministry God has given him to do. I need to help him be able to do that by not making a deal out of everything if it doesn't go my way. I need to learn how to trust in God to guide him and trust in him to listen to God's guidance. 

Pray for your marriage

That was the plea from a friend of mine, who's marriage is under attack.

She begged me to make sure I didn't let the little things slip through the cracks because the devil can use something small and grow it into something that will slowly destroy your marriage. I was moved by the way she is drawing strength from the Lord, in this very difficult time. 

There are so many things in this world that can cause use to loss our testimony. I am guilty of taking things for granted. Ladies, I don't know about you, I need to pray for my husband more, for our marriage and our testimony. 

Please heed my friends warning and remember to pray for your marriage, husband and family God has given you.  

When was the last time you were moved?

What makes, drives or push us to the point of action? Often times I find myself watching a situation from a distance trying to figure out the out come from a distance so I don't rock the boat. The last thing I want to do is have someone get up set with me or worse make me feel like I am a dim wit for saying or doing something when I didn't know the big picture. 

Yesterday, was on of those days. As I stood in line at Kroger, carefully sorting my purchase and placing it on the belt. I noticed the person in front of me was finishing, a little old black lady carefully getting out her little wallet and handing all she had, to the young man barley 18 behind the counter. After the cashier told her the total and counted what she had, he then called her over and said the total again and with a dazed look she went back to her little wallet trying to find the difference. By this point I knew what was coming. I had worked in a grocery store before and had to do the very thing, I was now dreading that the cashier would do.  The little old lady with a careful thought asked to put back some of her very modest purchase. 

I couldn't help but be moved with compassion for this lady who could very easily be my granny or me in years to come. I turned to Stephen and quickly explained what was taken place and asked if it would be okay to take care of her balance, without hesitation Stephen said " of course". 

By this point the lady was standing over her bags trying to decide what she could do without. I explained to the young man that we wanted to take care of her balance. There was an odd pause and then he started talking to his manager, explaining to her what we where doing and she told him how to handle the transaction. You'd think I was trying to pass a bill through congress or something. Then the sweetest thing happened that just melted my heart and brought me to tears in the middle of kroger. The cashier told the lady I was taking care of her balance and she started crying and saying she couldn't believe it. Then I started crying and told her not to worry one bit about it because if it were my granny I would hope someone would be kind to her. As she cried the bag boy and manager helped her to the side of the store out of the way because she was moved. I found a Whitfield Baptist Church invitation to give her on our way out and let her know that we would love to have her stop by for service and take her out to eat. 

We got out to the car and I just cried. I was just so upset at the thought of it being my granny. The manager, bag boy and cashier were so surprised that we would do such a thing. They said people just don't do that any more. Which also eat my lunch because how many times have there been that I just was so focused on myself I couldn't or wouldn't be moved by what was going on right in front of me. I praise the Lord for this wonderful opportunity to be a help to this little old lady and for the reminder it is, to let myself be moved more often to do something then just wishing I had after the situation is over

Standing in the Gap

That is the theme of this years Summit, in Pigeon Forge TN, with the Our Generation team. It has been wonderful so far and I look forward to seeing how God moves today. 

We started off with a joint session then we broke up into specialized classes. I have to say I really enjoyed the Stand by your man class taught by Amy Coffey and Mrs. Betty Gardner. It really hit home. 

After the session, I was talking with a lady and she started telling me how she couldn't do what they were talking about because her husband needed this or that, that he wasn't good with this, she had to be the way she was because she didn't have a choice. I really had to take a step back because I had said some of those exact things to myself at times. 

I can say that my attitude has not been right, a lot, when it comes to my role as a wife. It is something I need to work on daily, ok maybe hourly. I really have to be careful not to make excuses for the disrespect of my husbands position (hard to say that) but that is what I am doing when I correct him, give advice or options (especially in front of others), make decisions without consulting him first, ect... 

When I do that, I am basically under minding his authority over me, the  position God put him in, so I am actually doing all those things to the Lord as well.

Don't get me wrong. I don't set out to embarrass or dishonor my husband, my intentions are good and mean well. "I am trying to help, isn't that what I was made for" the problem is that our way of helping is not always God's way of helping. 

Am I standing in the Gap for my husband. Am I willing to help him in God's way and not my own. 

Understanding

It's something we desire so much from others. Yet we often have a hard time having it for the people we come in contact with, especially those that are closest to us. 

Thomas Edison believed that the concept of understanding comes from the two simple words under and stand. When one acknowledges that he stands below someone or something else, he makes himself receptive to obtain and retain information from it, thereby allowing for understanding to occur.

I wonder how often I really allow myself to acknowledge I am below someone or something, that I may be receptive to the information I am getting.

Little actions, Big lessons

A blog from our time in N. Ireland. 

Wondering if you are having an impact on the kids you teach?

 

I know that I do. We have been here a while now and it seems as if we are not making any head way at times. Recently, I had been thinking how I would like to see something to know what we were doing is having some effect. I had not told anyone I was a little discouraged, so I wouldn't bring them down with me. Then God allowed me to see something so good that I thought I would share.

It was a Tuesday night at the youth club, like any other. John Silverson, Stephen and I played some games with the kids until half 7, then John gave a lesson from the bible. The lesson was about the women who gave all she had to the Lord for her offering. I thought the kids listened well about the same as they do every week. 

I believe God was doing something in their hearts I couldn't see, because the next Sunday Amy one of our faithful Tuesday night goers came in for sunday school. Now from what I understand Amy used to come in for Sunday School but has not been in for a long while. Well I was sure glad to see her. She looked a little out of sorts, her long hair not fully brushed and kind of sleepy eyed still, but she was there and I praised the Lord in my heart for it. 

The service began with some songs and then the offering. That is when God let me see something very special that the others apparently didn't notice. Amy went up to give her offering and very shyly so no one would notice she pulled out a bag of coins from her jumper pocket and placed the bag gently into the bucket so none would hear them then she meekly made her way back to her seat. She left that day never bragging about her gift or bringing any notice to herself.  

It has been a couple of weeks since that event and Amy has not been back to Sunday school, I don't know why? I hope she starts coming back in soon. She is a very good listener and really enjoys the fellowship at our Tuesday club. So I don't understand what is keeping her away on sundays. 

I just thought it was a great blessing from the Lord. I had been a little down in my heart about seeing some sort of effect for the work we are doing. God had apparently spoken something to her for her to be there, maybe it was the lesson on Tuesday about the women giving to the Lord, I would like to think God moved in her heart about it. 

I pray the Lord continues to move in the hearts of the people we are working with. 

Sometimes it is the little things God uses to show me a big lesson. 

Visiting with Mom

One of the Joy's of being a missionary is you get to see the world or the part of it God has called you to, which also means you are not able to spend as much time with family as you would like. 

So today my mom decided to make the 3 hour drive and come visit with me for the day. I am very excited about getting to spend some quality time with her. 

Blogging made perfect

I am afraid my blogging has been next to nothing. Mostly because I have been struggling with what to write. Sometimes I just over think things and would rather do nothing. Glad nobody else has that problem. 

Lately, I have really been struggling with comparing myself to others. When I read the other wives blogs, I get discouraged about some aspects of my life I can not control. God didn't make us all the same and He doesn't have the same plan for our lives either. God has really been helping me see this in my life recently. I am a slow learner. 

My hope is to be more faithful in blogging. I heard this statement again, "I will only be more tomorrow, what I am today."  over the last few days and it really has been eating my lunch as Bro. Tony would say. 

So I figure I got to start somewhere. So please forgive the roughness of this blog. 

It's been two years...

I can hardly believe it myself when I say how long I have been married. Wow, where does the time go.  

More then once this year has someone congratulated us on our first year of marriage. While saying thank you, I simply add it's been two. Their response is the same, "Wow, Really, It doesn't seem like two years."

Honestly, it hasn't felt like two years to me either, it has gone by so fast or maybe the years went by slower when I was single, who knows.  

Over the past two years God has opened many doors and we have had a marvelous time going through them together. We are excited about the future and look forward to what God has in store for us.